Parents as PARENTS, and the Foundation of God

One of the most important aspects of a child’s life is the foundation of God. I speak from personal experience, both as a parent and a child growing up with this necessary groundwork. As parents we must be living examples of God’s love. It’s pertinent that we model this example through praying together, encouraging values and morals, and inspiring healthy, positive thinking in our children. Start early. Start now. Ask children what God means to them. Ask them what they think they mean to GOD. Reiterate God’s love and grace to them. Tell them of a forgiving God. Children may ask where God is. Time to break out The Word! Our love for our children and God’s love for us is evident, as is His existence. This spiritual basis is significant to the family as a whole. I could really use the nickels for every time I have heard a shrugging parent say, “everybody is doing it” and “every kid drinks.” So, therefor it is accepted? Who’s the parent here! What happened? Where are the "old days”? When was it that some dark, secret, teenage society came up with the idea that Mom and/or Dad being a friend would be way cooler? When was it that parents agreed to this concept of “befriending your child”?
While a child or adolescent wants to be independent, they still need the loving and spiritual guidance of their parent(s)/guardian. They require, and whether or not they ask for it, they want structured involvement, and boundaries. They can make friends in the school lunch line. Don’t cave when your child boasts, “I’m almost an adult” or “I already know what I am supposed to be doing (or what I am not supposed to do)” or, the ever so popular, “EVERYBODY is doing it!” Respecting independent physical, or thinking, behaviors doesn't mean that a parent should stop being a parent. For example, a kid can decide what to wear to a party, but it’s the parent’s job to set the limitations, one being the dreaded curfew. Establish reasonable curfews according to the activity. (Truly…what is there to do after a movie when it starts at 7 pm, and the curfew is midnight?) Ask questions! Just because a parent inquires, doesn’t mean they are prying in every nook and cranny. It’s pertinent to the child’s welfare to be aware of their interests, friendships, and whereabouts.
Let your child know you are there to communicate. Even if they don’t come you first (or at all), make sure he/she knows they can. Have open ears, and make not only rules, but also allowances that are meant to provide clean learning experiences. Be a positive, law abiding, spiritual role model for him/her.
No one tossed a manual to me after birth with a wink and snickered, “Good luck.” There is not enough Calgon in the world to get away from the typical head to head combat with a child/teen. I’ve heard my share of, “You’re ruining my life!” and “Stop treating me like a kid.” (While sometimes I want to pull my hair out and claim loudly, “Well, you ARE a kid. Look in the mirror!”, I am learning to keep my mouth shut and take a step backward.) This is where I raise a brow, exercise my fingers, break out The Good Book, and my Christian values cruise into play. So when you are challenged by your child, remember it is cool to be a parent, and to leave the camaraderie to the comrades. You're really not doing it alone, you know.